*Typing*

Anytime we are learning a new skill, we are developing tactic knowledge.Tactic knowledge must be learned through tactile experience rather than traditional education. You don't teach a child how to ride a bike. You show them. This is also true for walking, swimming, catching a baseball and playing a musical instrument. While a child less than a year old is illiterate, it's comical to think about a parent trying to teach their offspring how to walk by cracking open a book and pointing at a chalkboard. It's something that must be learned but can't necessarily be taught. This requires a great deal of time, energy and focus. However, once tactic knowledge is embedded in our brains and bodies, we no longer have to think about it. We don't think about walking. We don't think about swimming. We don't think about riding a bike. This is the tremendous beauty in tactic knowledge. It's intertwines itself into our flesh.

They say never to do business with friends or family. I do business with both. I'm not unaware of the risks. But, I believe the rewards outweigh them. It's rare to find individuals you can trust. Rarer still to find individuals who will stick around when the going gets tough. This doesn't mean working with friends and family is easy nor should ever be taken lightly. I've been fortunate to have healthy working relationships with my friends and family over the years. These are a few simple frameworks I try to keep in mind.

One, place the relationship before the business. You can always make more money. But, no amount of money can fix a severed relationship. Two, air your frustrations before they turn into resentments. When you're disappointed, say you're disappointed before it turns into hurt. Three, always assume good intent. Most conflicts arise from misunderstanding rather than malicious motives. Assume you are misunderstanding and seek to gain clarity rather than certainty. The stories you work up in your head are rarely anything more than fiction.

Overcoming difficult life events is one way to develop toughness. Another way is to keep the small promises you make to yourself. I'm going to wake up and run in the morning. Lace up your sneakers. I'm going to run a little further than I did yesterday. Sprint to the next stop sign. I'm going to stay off my phone before 5 p.m. Crack open a book instead. I'm going to call my parents on Sunday. Pick up the phone.

Difficult life events will occur without our coaxing. We will develop toughness as a result. In the short-term, a far less painful method to making ourselves a little tougher each day is doing the things we say we're going to do, even if no one is there to hear our promises and witness our commitment.

Great fiction is written without the end in sight. Sure, the writer might have a rough idea of what the end might look like. But, even still, the real end is rarely the same end the writer works up in her head. This is a treasure for the reader. If the writer knows where she is going, the reader will likely know too. Readers are intuitive creatures. They're not easily fooled. And so if the writer is hoping to write an exciting story, a story that obsesses the reader until the very end, she is better to not know where she is going. I say all this and I wonder why it is we so badly want to know the end of our own lives, paths, relationships and creative endeavors. It's not only impossible but unexciting.

I have a tendency to get lost in large group settings. They make me feel uncomfortable, awkward and strangely exposed. Sometimes I will cling to the walls of the room like a moth. Other times, I will disappear altogether. When there is no place to run or hide, I will become engrossed in my phone. It's a pacifier but a crude one. I prefer not to make a habit of it.

I, of course, am not the only one. You are likely guilty of carrying on conversations in large group settings with individuals who are not in the room. You should stomp out this nasty habit like a horse atop the hissing head of a rattlesnake. However, you should also consider it an indication that you crave one on one connection. Next time you feel the urge to text at a party or gathering, hone in on a single individual in the room. Carry on with them and them alone. You will be better for it. And, you won't piss off the host.