*Typing*

Holidays are difficult for those of us who measure our self-worth through our work. We become so used to proving our value day in and day out. Then, suddenly, we’re faced with two weeks of wide-open space on the calendar. Like a train stalled atop the rails, life creeps to a halt and work along with it. This slowness gives way to restlessness.

It’s very important to sit still amid this restlessness. We will be tempted to keep busy, to do more and to prepare for the year to come. Instead, we should be present. We should be present with our family. We should be present with our friends. We should be present with ourselves. Through this presence we will see that we are more than our work, our output, our following, our salary, our title or our latest achievement. We will see that we are friends, sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, spouses, fathers, mothers, lovers, thinkers, bakers, artists, readers, storytellers and citizens of the world.

Once the train starts moving again, perhaps we will find a renewed sense of energy as our relationship with our work has changed for the better. We will be less reliant on our work to prove our worth, which might allow us the space to enjoy our work for the sake of the work itself. Or, find work that we enjoy elsewhere. This shift can only happen by staying still amidst the restlessness; by being present during the quiet without looking towards distraction.

In the words of the composer Leonard Bernstein…

“Stillness is our most intense mode of action. It is in our moments of deep quiet that is born every idea, emotion, and drive which we eventually honor with the name of action. We reach highest in meditation, and farthest in prayer. In stillness every human being is great.”

I adore that last line. It’s one I’m holding close to my chest as we collectively inch towards the end of another year. In stillness every human is great. So, let’s be still. Let’s be great.

Don’t seek to be known by many people but instead trusted by the right people.

For the past decade, doing good business has been about building followings. In the next decade, it will be about building relationships. Fortunately, this doesn’t require producing mind-numbing content, dancing for an algorithm nor playing the viral slot machine.

You just have to be the kind of person who:

1. Provides tremendous value
2. Follows through

You do these two things and you will likely never be “internet famous”. However, you will attract the “right people”. Together, you all will do extraordinary work, create change and make an honest living.

It’s not flashy. It’s not easy. It’s not vogue. But, it works.

It’s very difficult to compete with someone who gives a damn about what they do because their work takes on an energy that’s impossible to replicate. The Greek’s have a gorgeous word for this: “Meraki”. It means to leave a part of yourself behind in your work. If you’re looking to develop a competitive advantage, find something you care deeply about and pour yourself into it.

Anytime we are learning a new skill, we are developing tactic knowledge. Tactic knowledge must be learned through tactile experience rather than traditional education. You don't teach a child how to ride a bike. You show them. This is also true for walking, swimming, catching a baseball and playing a musical instrument. While a child less than a year old is illiterate, it's comical to think about a parent trying to teach their offspring how to walk by cracking open a book and pointing at a chalkboard. It's something that must be learned but can't necessarily be taught. This requires a great deal of time, energy and focus. However, once tactic knowledge is embedded in our brains and bodies, we no longer have to think about it. We don't think about walking. We don't think about swimming. We don't think about riding a bike. This is the tremendous beauty in tactic knowledge. It's intertwines itself into our flesh.

Overcoming difficult life events is one way to develop toughness. Another way is to keep the small promises you make to yourself. I'm going to wake up and run in the morning. Lace up your sneakers. I'm going to run a little further than I did yesterday. Sprint to the next stop sign. I'm going to stay off my phone before 5 p.m. Crack open a book instead. I'm going to call my parents on Sunday. Pick up the phone.

Difficult life events will occur without our coaxing. We will develop toughness as a result. In the short-term, a far less painful method to making ourselves a little tougher each day is doing the things we say we're going to do, even if no one is there to hear our promises and witness our commitment.